FML

What sort of sandwiches do you have?
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Mews
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FML

Post by Mews » 14 Sep 2009, 14:25

http://www.fmylife.com

I'm sure this site was posted before, but a quick search turned up nothing. Anyway, here's a FML that Xact would enjoy.
Today, I had a fight with my little sister. Later she apologized and made me dinner to make up for it. I thought it was pretty good until I found out that instead of using Parmesan cheese in the recipe, she used foot shavings from her Ped Egg. FML
Having an abundance of platonic relationships reminiscent of my man, Mike Plato.

All that's left is a beautiful hour
And it's ours, ours.


The pale blue dot.

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Kayleb
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Re: FML

Post by Kayleb » 14 Sep 2009, 16:44

Today, I got out of the shower to find my cat staring up at me. Apparently my swinging penis looks like a cat toy to her, so she jumped up and clawed and tried to bite it. FML
PSYDUCK!
Dr. Emmett Brown wrote: If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits eighty-eight miles per hour... you're gonna see some serious shit.
P.s. I<3 Penny Kari 'nique

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Mews
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Re: FML

Post by Mews » 14 Sep 2009, 17:03

Today, my five-year-old came home from summer camp crying because her friends and counselors had all laughed at her when she couldn't identify colors correctly during a game. My husband then confessed that he had taught her colors wrong because he thought it would be funny. FML
Kind of shit I would do. Pure gold.
Having an abundance of platonic relationships reminiscent of my man, Mike Plato.

All that's left is a beautiful hour
And it's ours, ours.


The pale blue dot.

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Lellybaby
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Re: FML

Post by Lellybaby » 14 Sep 2009, 17:07

Today, I was putting my horse away into her pasture, when I slipped in the mud. In a haisty attempt to support myself, I grabbed the electric fence in on hand, and my horse with the other. The shock from the fence traveled through me to her, sending her running and leaving me with 2 broken teeth. FML
lol
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Juke a DK/Warrior, Die Anyway ._.

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Lellybaby
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Re: FML

Post by Lellybaby » 14 Sep 2009, 17:13

I love these!!
Today, my 11 year old son and I were going through some old photos. He saw one of me when I was 22 on a beach wearing a bikini. He said " Wow! Who's that?!" Quite proudly I said it was me. He looked at me and said " Whats happened?!". FML
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Juke a DK/Warrior, Die Anyway ._.

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Kayleb
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Re: FML

Post by Kayleb » 21 Sep 2009, 10:45

Today, while giving a lecture about gasses to a large chemistry class, I went outside to let loose an unusualy loud fart while they took some notes. I came back in only to see 300 students dying of laughter. I had left the wireless mic on. FML
Dr. Emmett Brown wrote: If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits eighty-eight miles per hour... you're gonna see some serious shit.
P.s. I<3 Penny Kari 'nique

Cyrion
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Re: FML

Post by Cyrion » 22 Sep 2009, 18:53

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML


:shock:
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midi
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Re: FML

Post by midi » 22 Sep 2009, 18:57

Maybe Tasmanian cyri? :shock:
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ soak rifts or riot ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Cyrion
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Re: FML

Post by Cyrion » 22 Sep 2009, 21:27

midi wrote:Maybe Tasmanian cyri? :shock:
That was my thought too Midi, but didnt want to offend any tasmanians here O.o
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Grouse
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Re: FML

Post by Grouse » 23 Sep 2009, 11:55

Awesome site, well done!
"Beep ... ... Beep ... ... Beep ... Beep ... Beep Beep BeepBeepBeepeepeepeep

...went my sarcasm meter."

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Lellybaby
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Re: FML

Post by Lellybaby » 28 Sep 2009, 15:35

Best one Ever!
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "because you can't find a real girl I made your current one prettier, Love Mom."
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Juke a DK/Warrior, Die Anyway ._.

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Philondra
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Re: FML

Post by Philondra » 28 Sep 2009, 15:40

Lellybaby wrote:Best one Ever!
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "because you can't find a real girl I made your current one prettier, Love Mom."
What ever happened to politely ignoring things like that?!

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Kayleb
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Re: FML

Post by Kayleb » 28 Sep 2009, 15:40

WTF PHIL!!1!?!?
Dr. Emmett Brown wrote: If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits eighty-eight miles per hour... you're gonna see some serious shit.
P.s. I<3 Penny Kari 'nique

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Lellybaby
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Re: FML

Post by Lellybaby » 28 Sep 2009, 15:44

Kayleb wrote:WTF PHIL!!1!?!?
Get with the times Kayleb

Phil has been back a whole 24 hours
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Juke a DK/Warrior, Die Anyway ._.

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Kayleb
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Re: FML

Post by Kayleb » 28 Sep 2009, 15:45

Lellybaby wrote:
Kayleb wrote:WTF PHIL!!1!?!?
Get with the times Kayleb

Phil has been back a whole 24 hours
I just got back from my grandparents, I spent the night visiting and missed Phils miraculous return FML
Dr. Emmett Brown wrote: If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits eighty-eight miles per hour... you're gonna see some serious shit.
P.s. I<3 Penny Kari 'nique

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